Come these holidays, I will do my darndest best to do the following:

-See lots and lots of Bethwyn.
-Three things on my 101 list
-Have a freaking picnic with Jess.
-Talk to Jack.
-Meet up with Bronwyn (Y)
-Pass at least one video game. (hopefully three or more)
-Pass my driving test.
-Watch a crapload of Avatar.
-See Ange.
-Play Brawl with Kareem.
-Play Munchkin Fu.
-See Stephen. (Poker night?)
-See Liam?
-See Matt?
-Catch up with Tess.
-Donate blood.
-Watch X-men Origins with Wally.

Am I missing anyone to catch up with?
More to come. Probably.

Changing your reality

The direction of
life is from duality to unity: Today I want to belong. I want to feel
safe and at home. I want to be aware of what it’s like simply to be,
without defenses or desires. I will appreciate the flow of life for
what it is–my own true self.

I will notice those moments of intimacy with myself, when I feel
that “I am” is enough to sustain me forever. I will lie on the grass
looking at the sky, feeling myself at one with nature, expanding until
my being fades into the infinite.

The fragmented mind cannot get me to unity, but I have to use it
along the way: What does unity really mean to me? What experiences of
oneness can I look back upon?

Today I will remember the difference between being at one with
myself and being scattered. I will find my center, my peace, my ability
to go with the flow. The thoughts and desires that drive me are not the
ultimate reality. They are just a way to get myself back to oneness.

I will remember that thoughts come and go like leaves in the wind,
but the core of consciousness is forever. My goal is to live from that

I am living in many dimensions at once; the appearance of being
trapped in time and space is an illusion: Today I will experience
myself beyond limitations.

In the same way I will experience love as a light that begins in my
heart and spreads out as far as my awareness can reach; as images arise
in my mind, I will send love and light in their direction.

Adapted from The Book of Secrets, by Deepak Chopra (Harmony Books, 2004).

Fecking cold, man…

The new insulation sure is doing a great job of keeping the frost inside the house.
My blanket was colder than I was for most of the night.
I really wish our heater wasn’t broken.
And I wish moreso that Mum would let me get a thermostat or heater in my room. I would be so, so grateful if she wasn’t terrified of it malfunctioning and starting a fire.
You know. I think I’ve taken for granted how much I enjoy summer. At least my fingers work and I can feel my toes.
If I had a mood ring, I’m certain I could turn it black.

101 Bump Again

So here’s another update on how I’m doing with my 101! I have 34 to go, most of which I could do within 24 hours if I really felt motivated. I’m almost exactly two thirds of the way there. Yea boi (Y)

1. Sponsor a child.
2. Offer to buy a homeless person a meal without being asked.
3. Do 10 chin-ups.
4. Read a non-fiction book.
5. Get a job.
6. Meditate every day for a week.
7. Draw a picture.
8. Go for 40 hours without eating.
9. Watch all the Lord of the Rings films in a row.
10. Write a letter to someone I’ve never met in person.
11. Go to an art gallery.
12. Go to a museum (wax or otherwise).
13. Not talk to anyone for a whole day.
14. Have a real sword fight.
15. Hug a stranger.
16. Get into uni.
17. Visit a Buddhist temple.
18. Go on an Edmund Rice Camps for Kids WA camp.
19. Give $300 or more to India.
20. Go rock climbing.
21. Take a massage course.
22. Pass four of the Zelda games.
23. Campaign/protest/rally against something.
24. Dress-up for some reason.
25. Attend a yoga or tai chi class.
26. Sit in the city and write stories about interesting people.
27. Start weight training.
28. Have a drum lesson.
29. Climb in through a window rather than use the door.
30. Play laser tag.
31. Celebrate Day of the Ninja.
32. Look at all the new deviations on my deviantART account.
33. Watch at least three episodes of "24".
34. Go to the movies by myself.
35. Learn first aid.
36. Watch a documentary.
37. Get drunk.
38. Spend a whole day in the library, from the hour it opens to the hour it closes.
39. Buy a work of art.
40. Become an official member of Amnesty International.
41. Go to a real party.
42. Go to the zoo. Pay homage to the penguins.
43. Get my P’s.
44. Have my tarot read.
45. Take someone out to lunch.
46. Make something out of a cookbook.
47. Hold a hand stand for 5 seconds.
48. Join aikido.
49. Visit Katie’s house.
50. Pass Final Fantasy X.
51. Pass every song on Guitar Hero III, all difficulties.
52. Read (or at least skim read) all of the Childcraft books.
53. Watch at least three new animes.
54. Ride a wheelchair.

55. Hug a male.
56. Re-learn all the Hiragana characters.
57. Learn Morse Code.
58. Play a game of poker.
59. Get "Age: 20" 100 times in the Wii Fitness Test.
60. Catch a train to somewhere I’ve never been.
61. Ride a horse.
62. Taste Dr. Pepper.
63. Solve a rubics cube.
64. Complete a jigsaw puzzle.
65. Watch the third season of Heroes.
66. Go to a play.
67. Try archery.
68. Run up a downwards escalator.
69. Give someone a bouquet.
70. Try a dessert I’ve never heard of before.
71. Learn three new piano songs.
Learn the language Al Bhed.
73. Wear contact lenses.
74. Learn 100 new words.
75. Get a pet dog or rabbit.
76. Punch someone in the face.
77. Learn calligraphy.
78. Give a waiter/waitress a tip.
79. Learn to cook
80. Sit an IQ test.
81. Go ice skating.
82. Join a gym.
83. Officially start learning another language.
84. Go overseas.
85. Ride a bike to the city (or somewhere equally painful).
86. Cosplay for an anime convention.
87. Walk somewhere that takes more than an hour (on foot) to reach.
88. Buy a CD from a busker.
89. Do a front flip or barrel roll.
90. Sit down in a park to read a book or write a story.
91. Donate blood.
92. Enter a competition.
93. Write on every single page of my 2007 diary.
94. Get a zippo lighter.
95. Attempt to drink an egg.
96. Read a magazine from cover to cover.
97. Ride a roller coaster.
98. Buy a doll from Oxfam.
99. Take swimming lessons.
100. Finish reading the rest of the Rurouni Kenshin manga.
101. Go to Scitech.

Tales of the Otori

I just finished "The Harsh Cry of the Heron", the fourth in the Otori books by Lian Hearn. After I finished the last page, I put the book down, closed my eyes and slowly went through each of the most powerful scenes in the book, tying the loose ends, seeing the genius as it all came together.

The Otori series have entered the immortal records of my favourite books. They are tragic, heartlifting, spinechilling, heartpounding, deeply philosophical, and as the Sydney Morning Heralds puts it, , a tour de force of pure storytelling. I can’t stop thinking about what could have happened to change the fate of everyone, some slight occurence that altered history, how things could have gone differently… Lian Hearn is truly a magnificent writer, and I think I’ll buy a copy of the books mainly to support her and express my admiration. I suggest anyone who has an interest in fuedal Japan, to get hold of the books and dig right into them.

I’ll spend some time pondering over the genius that was "The Harsh Cry of the Heron" before I seek the prequel, "Heaven’s Net is Wide".

Good night everyone.

The eyes of a child

This was an article posted on and I liked it enough to remember it. I hope you’ll like it too.

“Genius is nothing more nor less than childhood recovered at will.” –Charles Baudelaire From Art in Theory 1815-1900

For anyone who has observed a very young child for any length of time, you quickly realize that babies and toddlers have a markedly different relationship with the world than most adults do. Where as adults often seem purposeful and directed in their actions, with exacting and deliberate outcome in mind, young children are often moving through flowing states of exploration–engaging and routinely disengaging focus as dictated by their whim, unable to delay gratification, and barely possessing the ability to convey complex emotions. All of which often make children appear to be largely unfocused and residing in a state of fluttering consciousness. Parents often see this trait as apparent immaturity, in comparison to their relative crystalline focus and single-mindedness.

A fascinating article by Jonah Lerher outlining new groundbreaking research, which ran in the Boston Globe last month, provides an entirely different picture of what we think we know about baby/toddler consciousness. According to the piece, unlike the adult mind, which restricts itself to a narrow slice of reality (thus allowing us the ability to achieve sustained focus), babies can take in a much wider spectrum of sensation. “They are” as the author states, “more aware of the world than we are.”

Rene Descartes famously argued that the young child was simply bound by sensation and hopelessly trapped in the confusing rush of the here and now, but as evidenced by the research sited in this article, the average baby brain contains more brain cells that the average adult brain. This renders an adult’s attention to function almost like that of a narrow spotlight illuminating very specific parts of reality, whereas with very young children it functions more along the lines of a lantern, illuminating the whole of their surroundings. This is precisely the reason why a child, while not being able to remember the name of a beloved family member, will (without being asked to) remember the color of the walls, the shape of the candy bowl, and the crack in the ceiling of that nameless relatives home. Basically, because children have yet to become to accustomed to all of the rules of the world, as well as the details they are expected to focus upon, they instead opt (by nature) to just take everything in.


It’s not so much that I work well under pressure.

It’s that I have a tendency to do a superfluous amount of research and cram as much of it into an argument as possible while having a knack for knowing what markers want to read. Plus my literary skills are sufficient enough to surpass most of my peers and impress upon markers that I know what I’m on about. This is, as I have discovered, a more or less unbeatable combination of very fortunate merits.

It’s not that I don’t deserve the marks I get. I do the same amount of work, just squished into a much more condensed time frame.

Two more paragraphs… come on man, get it together.


My great weaknesses is that I care about people too much. It’s the reason I got into social work, but if I don’t do something about it, it’s the reason I’ll have to change course (unless I want to take dozens of people home to feed and cuddle). Can’t imagine what Bethwyn would say about that.


So I just wanted to slip in a quick note about how I’m going in my life at the moment.

Uni’s a bitch, but only because of a major law assignment due on Friday. It’s been giving me significant stress, due two weeks after the last law assignment so I’ve been frantically trying to do enough work for it. I’ve done five readings so far, which probably isn’t the greatest effort, but I’ll try and do two or three more tomorrow, plan out the essay, and sit down and write it over Wednesday and Thursday.

Work’s pretty okay! Although I don’t get paid well, I do admit that I like the way my job is going. I hardly get spoken to by Kyra or Michelle (though I’m still a wee bit scared of them when I do, but they’re apparently getting nicer which is a pleasant change. I also acknowledge my view of people is naively simplistic, based entirely on how nice people are to me.) and am more-or-less left alone to work at my own (rather comfortable) pace. The work isn’t hard or challenging, just tiring sometimes, but can be quite satisfying and helping people is surprisingly rewarding. The music’s good, I’m left to entertain myself with happy thoughts and stupid jokes, and I’ve been getting heaps of work lately (20 hours or so). The downside? No assignment time. But that’s cool, I’m making the most of good times at Coles and stocking up on cash for a potential holiday.

I’ve been insanely tired recently. Sleep doesn’t seem to make much of a difference. I get a little dizzy and, as always, I’m quite willing to nap during the day. I suspect my iron levels are low, so I’ve booked a doctor’s appointment to get that checked out.

Thank God You’re Here is back on! Hooray!

Things with Bethwyn are positively wonderful. My relationship is in a great place at the moment, despite my stress. Every day with her is a happy day indeed. If it weren’t for all my stuff being here, I’d probably live at her house. She completes me in every way, and I’m very happy she’s in my life.

So things are pretty good, for now. I’m sure I’ll think otherwise in a day or two when the pressure’s starting to get to me, but I’m trying to take care of myself until that point. So enough about me, how about you? How’s everyone doing? Studying hard? Working hard? Resting hard? What’s everyone been up to?