At times, I truly do despise my bigger brother, Panda, aka His Lordship (seriously, that’s a nickname of his relating to his account in RuneScape), aka Agent Quicksilver (he once considered himself an elite spy), aka Eugene.


After much wailing not so long ago, he convinced me to watch The Ring, even though I swore I would never. Truth be told, it wasn’t half as bad as I thought it would be. It wasn’t even a quater as bad as I thought it would be. If Pete stayed up until 3am, scared of his television until then, well… different perceptions, I suppose. At any rate, he got me to watch it by paying me 60 cents per minute. A good deal, I know. I got $61.20 at the end of the movie. Of course, being my brother, he was most distressed by the fact he owed me more than $200 at the time.


Today, he got his vengeance, showing his vindictive side. Firstly, he started small. He displaced my bookmark. Psht, yeah, like that did a lot. Idiot. Then, he took another step. He criticised Inuyasha, while I was watching it. What’s more, is that he’s forever ruined it for me. In response to Ivy, she’s correct in every way, except if all of it is the same, and you love one, you love all. I happen to be an anime fan. Then Eugene took another step after I turned off the TV, grumbling, but happy, knowing I could watch it when he was sleeping.


Turning to the computer, I logged into Tactic’s Core- an online game I thoroughly enjoy playing. I went to the kitchen for one reason or another, and when I got back, Eugene had gotten to his feet. He gave me that look that said "I know what I’m about to do is wrong, but it’s going to be fun to piss other people off," and in defense, I dove for the keyboard and locked the computer, just as he attempted to mash all the buttons in. He laughed and settled down, waiting for me to unlock it. There was nothing I could do, so I shut it down, grabbed my book (and the bookmark lying next to it) and ran to my room, locking the door.


Calling to me through the door, he threatened to draw on the pages of the Chronicles of Narnia- one of the few items in the household which I have idolised. I howled, and turned it into a scream to which Mum responded. She told me off for yelling and said Eugene wouldn’t do anything of the sort. I hissed back at her insistently, and she whispered in my ear she’d buy me another one if she did. Simmering, but not boiling, I returned to my room to meditate and release some of the negative qi.


About a minute later, he gave another playful call, telling me he had some things I might be interested in buying. After I could no longer ignore it, and expecting the worst, I went to check. He gestured, and in front of me, just out of reach (for it’s forbidden to enter one another’s room without permission- I at least will honour that even if he does not) was the Legend of Zelda, Ocarina of Time, Starfox Adventures, my Narnia book, and my glasses. I screamed again, longer and louder and far more vociferous than what he had seen previously. He had become vindictive, and I greeted him in kind belligerently.


For a moment, I pleaded. When it became clear he would accept nothing but money, I narrowed my eyes and scanned his room for things I could use to bargain with. I came up with the brilliant idea that I would steal all his panda posters and merchandise, and burn everything. I strode down the corridor and into the living room, screaming all the while until  I realised it wouldn’t do. In hysterics, I realised I didn’t need the piano to live happily- I could smash it to pieces and it would hurt Eugene many times more than it would hurt any of the rest of us. Mum was quick to stop me.


After much coaxing, I agreed to buy everything back for $62, which Mum promised she would pay me. I reasoned it was better to have the money in cash than for Eugene to scam it out of me some other way, though I felt guilty for robbing my own mother.


At any rate, violence begetted violence, and I’m smart enough not to continue the feud. One day, I know that I will punch Eugene in the face. I have come closer and closer during out episodes, and sooner or later, I will not be able to stop myself from trying to kill him. It’s nice to have a way to take out your anger, even if it’s on your 18 year old brother, more than twice as strong as you. Ah well. If I go to hospital, he will be blamed. Either way, I have some compensation for the next thing he does against me.

"Vengeance is a dangerous thing. So tempting when you see it. So sweet when you seek it. So very deadly when it’s yours." Anon.

Inuyasha Fan-boy?

It is with some regret, I admit that I have finally succumbed to the ubiquitous presence of Japanese Anime. Specifically, I have finally watched an episode of Inuyasha. Eight episodes, actually, and it’s completely irresistable.
Firstly, Inuyasha has the cutest ears in existence. Because I value my mortal life, I would not have the bravado to pet them as so many fan-girls would kill to do, but I’d just like to say that the twitching is adorable.
Secondly, I have many a question. How did Inuyasha get hair of the fire rat? How did he get the Tetsusaiga? How did Sesshomaru-sama get the "Tensaiga"? How did Miroku get involved with them, and why does he carry that staff? If Miroku’s Wind Tunnel sucks things in, doesn’t that mean he has a bajillion demons inside him? Where did they meet Sango? And how the devil can she throw that massive boomerang?
Thirdly, I cannot let this obssession continue for the sake of my sanity. It will consume me if I encourage it, but damnit, there are still two DVD’s I haven’t watched, and by golly, I’m going to watch them. I’m just such a sucker for anime. Pokémon, Beyblades, Sailor Moon (SHUT UP! It’s a quality show), Dragonball, Chobits and pretty much any other anime I’ve been graced to watch. They’re all irresistable, what with their massive eyes that take up half their face, and their little sweat beads and ability to fall over instantaneously, and the lumps on people’s head when they’ve taken a walloping to the noggin… It’s just all so classic!
That, and I’ve never been able to resist anime romance. It just makes me all fuzzy inside when a guy and a girl get close to admitting they have feelings for one another, and the closer they get, the more torn up they are. Then, traditionally, they will either never admit it, or they’ll deny it outright and try to hate each other for a few episodes. At any rate, it makes me all warm and tingly and I must seize something to squeeze in a massive bear hug.
I heart Inuyasha, but *le sigh*. There’s more to life than Japanese cartoons. I’ll see where this newfound passtime takes me, but for now, I have things to do before school resumes.

“Efeu’s Nicknames”

I found this in my drawer from a while ago, and thought it was rather sweet.
  1. Pirate. (I think it’s her right eye that’s slightly weaker than her left. Hence, the need for an eyepatch.)
  2. Giraffe. (She said she almost didn’t get into air rifle because of her long neck)
  3. Efeu. Ivy in German, lacking propper punctuation.
  4. Miss Wong.
  5. The Scientist.
  6. Lass.
  7. Little Miss Ivy.
  8. Freulein Ivy.
  9. Snake Woman.
  10. Gunslinger.
  11. Pajama Girl.
  12. Spoon Girl.
  13. Bulbous Cheeks. [o.O]
  14. Tramp.
    [Now that I think about it, some of these are pretty nasty!]
  15. Model-in-the-Making.
  16. Daytripper.
  17. Eskimo. (Ice Kachang-related?)
  18. Raflle-ticket. (Envious of her school?)
  19. Germaine Germainia. (Long story. Involves Lord Jackemus, and Ivy’s love for Germany.)
  20. Iron Pumper.
  21. Little Miss Faker.
  22. Mad Woman.
  23. Rememberall.
    [You have as much chance of guessing these as I do.]
  24. Forest Lady. (Vi for Victoria. Victoria is a character out of the "Theif" games, who had power to control the forrest.)
  25. Biologist.
  26. Milady.
  27. Thesselia. (??)
  28. Leprechaun.
  29. Croc Hunter.
  30. Weasly. (This one was clever. She had McDonalds one day, and ate it in favour of talking to me. Ronald McDonald, Ronald Weasly, Weasly for short.)
  31. The Artist.
  32. Mei Mei (little sister).
  33. Giantess (NOT a nice one.)
  34. Carnivore (o.0)
  35. Pearly Whites.
  36. Slick.
  37. Jebedia.
  38. (The) Meeper.
  39. Cathy Freeman.
  40. Sugardimples.


There were about a dozen more which I didn’t write down, but hey. I’d say 40 is a reasonable list. I came up with them about a year or a year and a half ago, so forgive me if they’re stale.

The Most Stupid Things I Have Done Today

Ouch. That’s a good word for me right now. Ellie’s boots took the skin off my leg. For some reason, my elbow is aching terribly, making leaning on the desk as I write quite hazardous. Hey. Hey! There’s a lump on my elbow! How the devil did that get there? I suspect it  has something to do with dear Elleanor!
Anyways, this evening’s entry is all about my immense stupidity, which for some reason, I didn’t mind expressing. It was probably pestilent, and possibly degraded any of the modesty I still clung to, but for once, I wasn’t Mr Pedantic. The setting is a park in Perth, who’s name escapes me. It’s nearby the belltower- fond memories.
Number One.
Willow either asked or dared me (I forget) to attempt to consume a large amount of sour sherbert. Ooo that makes my mouth water. I decided I wouldn’t. Lying in the grass a few minutes later, I noticed my sherbert packet and thought, "Sure, why not? I can take it." Ha.

I just tipped the bag into my mouth while I was lying down. Moments later, a small cloud of white sherbert erupted over my face as I coughed it all back up. Sitting bolt up right, I proceeded to cough little whiffs of sherbert all over my clothes and eventually rolled over onto the grass to make a little white patch in a sea of green. Shaking with mirth, Willow passed me the bottle of lemonade which I instantly unscrewed and tipped into my mouth. Fortunately, it washed everything straight down my throat. I collapsed in relief.
"Never doing that again," I groaned, setting the lemonade down.

Number Two.
A few minutes later, I felt restless once again. Reaching for the sherbert, I was careful not to inhale any, and to be sitting upright when I did it. I emptied the other half of the packet into my mouth and closed it carefully, my saliva quickly trying to break down this beastly candy. My eyes went wide. I cringed, doubling over and screwing up my face, unable to move out of my curled position. In a frenzy, I grabbed the lemonade and tipped a generous portion into my mouth, hoping it would dissolve the powder. I was sadly mistaken, as it became apparent the two weren’t a good mix. The fizzy lemonade clashed with the sour tingle, and the result was far more than any mouth of my calibre could handle. I coughed, spraying it on the grass for several seconds as my body rejected the foul combination. Willow of course, could not stop laughing. Ellie I believe was bemused at my idiocy.
Number Three.
Being all sugary and sticky, I went for my ablution at the nearby water feature. Just a little pool of flowing water, with male kangaroos nearby. I knelt by it, washing my hands, arms, and resisting the temptation to wash my face (Willow dusted it off for me), for who knows who else has stuck their feet in the water? Willow, who had accompanied me (she seems to be a recurring theme, doesn’t she?), noticed someone had thrown their cap in the water and pointed it out to me. She dared me to get it. Well, what was stopping me? I grabbed it, squeezed some of the water out and headed over to Ellie for her to try it on. Willow stopped me in the interest of preserving our lives, so I dumped it on my head because it was easier than holding it. The fact I was shivering probably didn’t help, but I crawled out into the sun to dry like a repitilian might.
Number Four.
Willow declared I was on a roll, and asked me to shout "I am the smartest man alive!", just like Happy Gilmore when he correctly answered 2+2. I argued that I needed a raised platform. She indicated the bench. Like a fool, I marched over, stood up, and screamed it at the top of my lungs. Willow lost it in hysterics, and Ellie sort of seemed bored with the idea. Perhaps it’s just me, but she didn’t seem very happy this afternoon. Either way. It was at that moment I heard a shout.
"Hey, it’s Yoshi!"
At that moment, I got kind of freaked out. My first thought was that I was drunk somehow, and it wasn’t really happening. My second thought was that I had to leave. Fast. I dashed off the bench and leapt behind Ellie, cowering for a moment, hoping they would go away. No such luck.
They turned out to be those Year 12’s from Trinity. One of them asked me a long, long time ago what my name was. For some reason, I was compelled to say the first Japanese name that came to mind.
"Higashi," I answered.
"Yoshi!" he crowed. "What an awesome name!" Ever since then, it’s been a habit.
Regardless, when they came over, Willow dared them to give the sherbert a try. They weren’t quite as stupid as  myself though, but hell, they were missing out on the best damn sugar rush in the world, all concentrated in a little pile of dissolved powder that tries to burn a hole through the back of your mouth.
Number Five.
Challenging Ellie to a fight. Unfortunately enough for me, my sugar rush from the sherbert and lemonade had made me insanely happy and energetic, and when it was over, I just crashed on the grass (which made my incredibly itchy later on) and found it near impossible to move. It was then I decided that I was more than a match for Ellie.  I was too tired to really do much other than stumble backwards to avoid her kicking me, and my blocks were a lot slower than they should have been. Normally I would have dived on her and pumelled her, but how on Earth was  I supposed to pummel lady Hilda Adair? It just doesn’t happen.
We had to run to catch the bus, and unfortunately for me, my body just wasn’t listening and sort of slumped. Willow almost dragged me to my feet. It was a rushed goodbye. I later ate an apple, in the hopes of having some energy restored (as it’s more effective at keeping you awake than coffee- most fruit is) but I ended up hurting a tooth overloaded with sugar. Damn fruit.
I stopped by St George’s Cathedral again, like I did last Wednesday. I just like it because it was built to be a magnificent structure with stained glass and everything. All pretty coloured lights, and yet, very dark, and very reverently quiet. It’s a good place to meditate and reflect. Again, I went to the candles, and lit one of them that had fallen off its perch. I put it to one side, and dropped half of my money ($1) into the box, to pick four more candles.
Number 6
I lit the candles symbolically- one for me, one for Ellie, one for Georgie, and one for Willow. Thanks to me, three were already lit. I lit mine off the one with the most wax left. It burned steadily, flawlessly. That was mine. I took another, reaching deep down where no one else would take a candle, and pulled out Ellie’s. It wavered for a while, but the flame was strong, and it burned boldly. I set it on the rack. Georgie’s was next- steady at first, then wavering, but was eventually put out because I hadn’t given it long enough to burn. I re-lit it, and it shone gently. Willow’s I found at the very bottom of the very largest pile, and ran through all of the candles so the flame came from a bit of everyone else’s. Unfortunately, there was no where to put it. Oh, wait. I had missed a level. I put it on the top of the stand.
It was after I left that I realised the candles burned in a shape of a cross.
Number 7
I had a conversation with a statue, because I felt like it. I checked the name on the plaque and talked to it for a while about being jolly, and bean-like, before continuing on to the train station. I also smiled at anyone who looked at me, in the hopes of making it contagious.
Number 8
I had another cold shower. I’m surprisingly used to those, so long as I don’t overdo myself. If I start shivering, I can enjoy the cold water, but I start to fear for my health. I usually treat myself to a burst of warm water at the end so I can appreciate what the reason I’m doing it- to tell the difference between hot and cold. It’s probably not good for my body to have the extreme temperatures juxtaposed though. I think I’m willing to dive into a swimming pool now.
Now I’m really, really tired. I still haven’t quite gotten over that depleted sugar rush thing, and my eyesight is sort of wavering.
Number 9
Another attempt at sleeping on the floor tonight. I sleep terribly- constantly wake up until I get too frustrated and heave myself into bed in the early hours of the morning, in the hopes I’ll catch an extra few undisturbed hours. I woke up at 3 this morning and kept flitting between consciousness and subconsciousness, until I just decided it wasn’t worth it and set my alarm for seven, lying on my matress, warm and snug and comfy. I dreamed hours has passed without my alarm going off, and I feared every moment that I would suddenly wake to a shrill ring. I was delivered when I woke naturally, seconds from the alarm beginning its morning ululation.
EDIT: Eugene woke me up at 2am, for reasons I can’t recall. He made me get on my bed, because he said Mum would never forgive him if he let me sleep on the floor. I found myself too exhausted to do anything when I woke up this morning. I can’t take it anymore. Screw sleeping on the floor, I’ll do it at a less crucial time. Right now, I need to focus on being awake enough to be ready for school. And hope that I’m not haunted by nightmares.
I hope tonight that I am so tired, my body won’t care and I’ll just fall asleep and stay that way. I think I’m going to need to go now though- before I just crash. Thanks for reading this far, and good night to ye, oh trinity. Keep the blue flag flying *salutes*

The Decalogue

I’d just like to say a few things.
Firstly, Willow is right. Because of the heirarchy of Gods/Goddesses, it is impossible for me to willingly hurt her. Ellie however, seems to have a tendency to kick me, and she is swiftly wearing away the chivalry that protects her. Soon I may be forced to stop offering to carry her bag, or worse, be inclined to fight back. I could beat you Ellie, and you know it. Halfway through our wrestling match, I realised that I couldn’t hurt you, and so just stood there instead. I saw your foot leave the ground, I saw it swing towards me, and I felt it connect with my leg. It stung for a few seconds, but nothing more. Come on, you don’t seriously believe you’re agile enough to hit me, let alone strong enough to hurt me? Willow, well, she could be more of an adversary, but I could still take the two of you if I could bring myself to land a blow.
Anyways, number two. My glasses are now seriously disfigured. Remember how they were bent to inane proportions? Yeah, I’d say that was your fault Ellie. I half-bent them back into shape, and managed to stick the lens back in, but now they’re sloping so I can half-see over the rim on my left eye. Ah well. I had been pestering Mum to make an optometrist appointment for a few weeks. Now’s the perfect excuse to force her into it.
Three. Solomon, you cheated. You can’t play Upwords to save your life. Since when could you just stick tiles anywhere on the board? Or use Mah-zhong (sp?) characters as letters? And "Condominiums" is a perfectly legitimate word. Madam Wong kept giving me extra tiles- it was she who cheated on my behalf! Bottom line, you cheated, and you know it.
Four. Number three was relating to a dream. Solomon was playing Upwords with himself (Scrabble, except you can put tiles on top of each other to replace certain letters), and I challenged him to a game. He cheated. For some reason, he put the word "Condom" on the side and grinned. Somehow I took it as an implication to Ivy, and added "inium" on the end, and later, replaced a "goat" character with an s. Honestly, Doubleyou tee ef?
Five. I also dreamed of the night Ivy and I went to the movies in Australia, except this time, we were going to see Narnia. Ivy vanished for a while, and I knew I had to get home soon, but I just couldn’t help myself. I took out my last, and emergency $10 (that I keep with me always- that’s all I had left after yesterday by the way) and bought a ticket to see the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, but my conscience got the better of me, knowing that I shouldn’t keep Mum waiting for two hours. I left the cinema, and haggled with the ticket-man to give me my money back. He fumbled for a few minutes, seeing how much he owed me and checking various scheduals before disappearing into the back room. 10 minutes later, I realised he had ditched me. Ivy rejoined me, and I shot a death-look at another one of the employees, and left.
Six. I am now officially POOR. I spent exactly $40 yesterday, being all the money I had on my person (minus the $10), and about an eighth of that went to buskers. Damn them and their gimmicks. And damn me for falling for them!
Seven. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah I’m so poor now! ='(
Up until now, I have never known an occassion where I actually needed money, but did not have enough, with some left over to spare. Maybe I should call in that $130 Eugene owes me. Not that he’ll be able to pay me.
Eight. EUREKA! I can just be an idiot and use my moneybox! The one I made in Year 9 of the Eye of Truth. It holds 50 $1 coins and 25 $2 coins. Except it will take me a few months to replace them all, but hell, it will WORK! I am so good. I am so good. Everybody loves me cause I am so good. And I have a plan, too. Oh I’m so devious. Mwuhahaha!
Nine. Ignore the above.
Ten. Have a good day everyone, or good night if you’re a little late!

Laser Corps.

Today, Eugene celebrated his 18th at laser corps- open field laser tag. They gave you full body army camoflage, which surprised me by actually working. You were sort of overlooked if you were hiding properly. They also gave us green and brown face paint, and Eugene grabbed me and smooshed it all over my cheeks, being stronger than me. That in itself was fun though.
The field itself was impressive- long grass on hills which you could lie in and be completely invisible. Countless barricades to take cover behind. A foxhole- sandbags and wooden structures lining a pit. No real trenches as such. Huts and shacks and shelter things to control. 500 square metres in which to battle.
There were three targets. One on the front of your head, one on the back of your head, and one on your gun. The only way to differentiate the teams was by their hat- either a swag hat or a cap. There were four types of guns. The small assault rifle, with a reasonable magazine but poor range. The larger version, same deal, longer range. A different type altogether (which I chose) that said "Lock and load" when it was turned on- just a big old chunky gun that shot a lot of bullets. The fourth was a sniper rifle (with actual scope), including rapid fire capabilities, and a grenade launcher if you managed to get within 5 metres of the target. It was a widespread attack and would wipe out everyone in front of you. That was the gun Chazwozzer told me to get. Unfortunately, I later suffered for my stupidity with the lack of range.
Basic rules were this. You start with 7 lives, you have 10 clips of ammo with about 50 bullets per clip. The gun had two standard buttons (with the exception of the sniper rifle, which could use eight grenades); switching between single shot and rapid fire, and reload. The reload took anywhere from 10 to 30 seconds, leaving you quite vulnerable in a fight.
The first game was a death match- getting used to the guns, how they work, the range, the tactics, the terrain. Unfortunately, I got slaughtered because of a dodgy defence, and not realising that I couldn’t snipe people- the range on the guns was more pitiful than I thought. 60 metres. We lost that one.
The second game was capture the flag. We have one shack with a flag in front of it. They have one on the opposite side of the field, across or around the creek. Our side of the field was uphill, looking down on theirs. We had the advantage, but we didn’t take advantage of it. We sent out squadrons of attack teams, all of which came back dead. Our small shack was quickly surrounded, and Herarn and I (who were defending it) got 0wned.
The third game was another session of capture the flag, with the bases reversed. I switched guns with Joseph Mullaney, so I had an assault rifle that could shoot farther and was easier to handle- not quite as big, or heavy. This time, I took a more practical approach, and sprinted out across the middle of the field with Captain Wildflame in order to seize the fort in the middle. We had complete control for a while, but they managed to get snipers up there to shoot us, and eventually, we lost too many lives. When I had three left, I said goodbye to Matthew, and Tony (who had joined us), and just ran off into the bush. They shot at me as I ran madly, but I got to shelter, and was in enemy territory. No one noticed me except Eugene, who was sitting on his fat ass in the fort behind his flag.
Taking cover behind a large tree, I engaged in a duel with my older, fatter brother, and of course kicked his ass. Then I saw Gerald walking on the top of the hill, and opened fire on him instead. He didn’t see me until he had lost a few lives, and then I had to shfit to an akward position behind the tree that protected me from both Eugene and Geralds attacks, for they were about ninety degrees apart. I decided I would much rather take out Eugene, but he was spitting bullets at me, and after I got down to my last life, I decided it wasn’t worth it. At that moment in time, a third team member joined the two that were already firing from me, making it impossible to hide behind the tree from any angle. I returned to base sullenly.
With a new set of lives, I ran to the most unsuspecting of places- a bush to the far left of the field. Our flag was directly in front of me, along with the barricades that littered the grass. Anyone approaching would be shot- and it worked, too. Until they discovered where I was and I had to take shelter in another nearby hut. I peered out the window every once in a while to see if our flag was still standing, and after about five minutes of waiting, I noticed something strange.
Everyone from the enemy team that had died (and hadn’t had the chance to respawn) had walked up to our cabin and were having general conversation with the occupants. It seemed everyone on my team was dead. Perhaps they had forgotten about me? I blinked for a moment then stepped out, asking if it was over. Matthew looked at me and shook his head sadly- the rules stated that the dead men couldn’t communicate with the living, and that was all I needed. I was responded with a stream of gunfire, and dived behind a barricade, now on my last life. Honestly… The idiocy.
Gerald ran around, hoping to catch me with his rapidfire, but I was slightly more accurate and took his last life before he got mine. I leaned around the barricade and shot wildly at everyone, but all of them seemed to be dead. Damnit, why didn’t they stay out of the way? Long Li jumped out from behind them and boom. Game over.
The fourth game was a Sniper round. There were three snipers that had camped somewhere on the field, their guns now only able to shoot one bullet every three seconds. They had ten lives. The other 12 of us had 3 lives, and needed to take out the snipers by sheer force of numbers. There was a catch to the game- a traitor was amongst our midst. He would shoot us in the back when we weren’t watching. We came up with the idea to split into threes, so the traitor would be outnumbered.
As we lined up, our backs turned to the field and the snipers in position, he blew the whistle and the game began. Immediately, a cry of pain sounded from someone’s gun, indicating they’d been hit. Swearing wildly, all of us scattered and dashed for cover. Wildflame ran straight up the field and into the fortress we had previously manned. I looked around, grinned to myself, and shot off after him. If I was going to die, I would do  it bring the biggest moron I can, just to put them off for a while.
Surprisingly, I made it over the one hundred meter dash without harm. Crouching in the fort with Wildflame lying across the ground and peering out through observation holes, my gun suddenly cried out. "Wasn’t me," said Matt, looking around from where the shot might have come from. I swore and dashed to another position, to be covered from another side.  No quater. After my three seconds of invulnerability were up, I lost another life. I ducked down further and shifted again, hoping that my nemesis would just miss the shot, but alas, to no avail. My gun screamed in agony, and I sighed, folded my arms and glared at the huts and various hiding places they might have been in. Gone in the first minute. Dang.
I asked the referee where the snipers were, now that I was dead. The firstsniper was taking cover in another one of the hut overlooking the fields. Standard. The second sniper, Gianni, was lying down in the long grass next to a hut on the opposite side of the field. He was the one who shot me. No one even found him, and I’ll explain why in a moment.  Anthony had found himself the perfect location- a small ditch with a gigantic bush in front of it, with a hole large enough to fit the gun through and rest its weight on. It served as a tripod, and he could steady his aim with it. It was he who first shot one of us when the game began, for he was positioned with a perfect view of the field so no one could sneak up to him in any way.
Now, the other 10 of us or so who ran off in the opposite direction we did, across the bridge to the opposite field, were all crouched in the hut. Daniel shot Gerald in the back of the head, and Gerald turned around and shot him back. Daniel screamed,
"Gerald’s the traitor!" and all hell broke loose. The referee and I were laughing our heads off because we had no clue what was going on. All we heard were the sounds of rapid fire coming from the hut for about thirty seconds, and screaming. Eugene was especially audacious.
"You IDIOTS! You’ve wiped out half our team!"
Soon enough, five of them trudged out with their hats over their guns, indicating they were dead. Daniel should have been proud of himself to cause that much havoc. The rest of them were taken out by Gianni.
I did manage to catch a glimpse of Wildflame chasing one of the snipers out of his hut and blasting the living daylights out of him, but he was taken down by Anthony before he could take the gold. Brave, and tactical in his moronic ways. What hurt about losing that game, is that the snipers have never won before. We lost because we wiped ourselves out.
Ah well. Laser corps- loads of fun, though it did get really hot and sweaty in those camos, and the gun sort of cuts into your hand if you hold it too long. After a while, you just get too tired to do anything but sit on the ground behind a shelter and hope you don’t have to move any time soon. I’d love to see how Lord Jackemus could compete in open-field combat. He’s legendary at it, and he takes after Solid Snake from Metal Gear Solid. I also learned another very important lesson.
You can appreciate a hot shower ten times more than you normally would, after you’ve had a cold shower. It feels absolutely glorious to feel the warm water in opposition to the cold. You appreciate things so much more when you only have them as a rarity. That’s why I’m going to try to have cold showers from now on, sleep on the floor, and refuse to buy ice cream except for once a month. But when I do have a hot shower, or sleep in a bed, or eat my favourite ice cream, I will enjoy it more than all the time you spent showering and sleeping and eating altogether.
Ever noticed how good it feels to be home after a holiday?
And thanks for reading this much. I know it must have been tiresome on your eyes, but I just felt the need to go into graphic detail about all the nitty gritty. Fun fun fun! I’ve got to go back there some day.
With trigger happy love,

Crazy John

A little while ago, an hour or two at most, I finished reading a book called "Crazy Jack", by Donna Jo Napoli. After a while, I subconsciously did a critical analysis as I tend to do from time to time. I was comparing Jack, the main character, to Xing Xing (pron. "Shing Shing"), the main character from another one of her fabled books, "Bound". I reasoned why I felt like Bound was a special book to me, and figured that it was because of the reader positioning. Xing Xing was in a quagmire, and had a bleak, perfunctory life. You couldn’t help but pity her, and rejoice in her deus ex machina. Jack had something of a different story. I actually said this to myself.
"I can’t sympathise as much with Jack because he’s… Crazy."
Note: I will begin reading the four Dickens’ books shortly, perhaps after lunch. I have until 10am on Wednesday to finish all of them (848 pages- oh crap!) and suspect that I won’t be sleeping for a while. Eugene’s party is tomorrow, at lasercorps (laser tag in an open field with various assignments- protect a VIP while the opposing team sets up an ambush, capture the flag, capture the hill, all out death match etc. They give you real army camo and an assortment of sniper rifles, automatics and the likes. I can scarecly wait to blow his brains out. Figuratively speaking) taking another huge chunk out of my time. Ah well.
I’ve also learned (supposedly) 213 words. At least, that’s how many are in my little notebook for words I come across in books that I don’t know the precise meaning of. Realistically, I can remember maybe 50 of them. Alas, I must go. Damn Charles Dickens.

Mmf… *mumble mumble*

I’ve been having a rather poopy day. Normally I would say that’s a matter of perception- if you choose to notice all the bad things in your day, it’s a bad day, full stop. On this occassion, those bad things I notice are the ones that make me feel either guilty, hopeless, or like breaking a piece of furniture. It’s not healthy, especially the last one.
Since I got back from… Where did I go today? Ah yes, church. I enjoyed church today. Father Steve isn’t so scary now. When I got back, Eugene told me to watch Donnie Darko. I told him I had. He asked if I had watched Fight Club. I said yes. Bad move. I had forgotten he banned me from watching it, because apparently it was a big legal thing to watch an R rated movie if you’re underaged. Personally, I thought it was a "Mature, 15+", or tops, a "Mature Audiences, 15+ or parental supervision". Still, he refused to listen to my arguementation, using an example of him watching an MA when he was 11 or 12, then making me watch it. I’ve never gotten over my phobia of wooden dolls since. Anyways, he refused to listen to me, and put me in a foul mood. I locked myself in my room.
For a while, I lay in bed, trying to cool down. Then Mum, for want of a better term, screeched at me to eat dinner. She brought it to me, and I ate it in the darkness of my room, lit only by the luminescent glow of my digital clock and CD player. I put on "Black Eyed Peas- Monkey Business", and for a while, listened to the songs. Then I just let them flow over me as I dreamed of being elsewhere.
Eugene seemed to be on speaking terms with me, two hours later when I emerged, having spent my time writing. He was looking for a clip from South Park to show me- something he found to be hilarious. When he couldn’t find it, he just ignored me and waited for me to leave. I asked him how his website was going. He snapped at me. I offered to take the phone back for charging. He rebuked me. I left, in the hopes I could use the computer before I slept.
Dad was already on it, browsing websites for guitar chords. He said he’d be ten minutes. I said I would stand behind him and wait. And I did. For ten, long minutes. When I gently interrupted him to say time’s up, he raised his voice and met me with reproval, not so much asking as telling for five more minutes. I felt very sad.
I guess I just need some chocolate, and to watch that South Park video Eugene has. Apparently, Cartmen dresses up as a retard. I don’t know. Good night, I guess.