Okay, big catch-up entry to break the streak of Ivy-based posts (not that there’s anything wrong with that, mind you!) However, I must warn you in advance that this entry contains tmi (too much information) for anyone who doesn’t care.
Well, for the first time this morning, I didn’t dream of Ivy. Little strange isn’t it? I might have, but I’ve forgotten a lot of the dream. In essence, it was basically trapping me in Gibney Hall wearing my labcoat; and only my labcoat. I was about to gather my clothes (at the doorway) when Mr Watson and the English class walks in. I dashed up some scaffolding and watched them as Watto took a chair and sat down to mark his essays. That’s what he usually does in his spare time anyhoo, but there I am, watching them pretty much exposed. I have strange dreams don’t I?
There are two ironies in this dream. The first is; I woke up and really was wearing only my labcoat. Fortunately, I was safe in my room at 4am. The second is that they had set up scaffolding in Gibney Hall for music night- tonight. I spent my morning lugging around chairs, desks, and other various pieces of junk, and I’ve hurt my back and splinterised my fingers. However! I felt like a warrior somehow lol. I don’t know, don’t look at me like that! It was me vs the chairs, and I kicked those chairs asses. Ohhhh yeah *whip lash* I was also smart enough to take off my ring before I did it- and good thing too, because my hands were burning by the end of period. Literally burning. I was holding them out in the rain and you could almost hear the sizzle. Ouchie! Anyway, it had better bloody be worth it. What I’m really looking forward to is the small dinner after the performances- that’s always great.
Going off topic again, I also thought about love for a while. I’ll never get enough of Ivy, ever. If I talk to her online, I’ll want to keep on talking, or have more. If I call her, same applies. If she meets me, or vice versa, same applies once more. I will forever long to hold her in my arms, and when I put it into words, it occured to me that love is very much like a drug. You need it once you’ve had a taste, so to speak, and it can blur your judgement and cause you to do stupid things. It’s cruel, but people lock away drug addicts so they can’t wreck their lives. Why is love so different? It gives people that endless happiness when they’re with their loved ones and it’s hard to let go of them, like heroine or speed to an addict. I suppose the only difference is the physical impact, as well as loved ones are generally cheaper than illegal drugs. I guess it’s also promoted by a community for the economy and so on and the miracle of life, as it goes. I don’t know, it seems cruel to allow loved ones to be together to try to quench their thirst for company, but to deny people the same thing with drugs. Just my opinion, remember how desperate some people can get, both for love and drugs.
Anyway, going back to everything else that I happened to write into Microsoft Word while Ivy was here so as not to break the chain of entries. Firstly, on Wednesday morning (the day after she left) there was a red mark on the left side of my neck. My theory is that Ivy either gave me one enduring lovebite, or something else bit me lol. I’m hoping it was the former, from 3:00 on Tuesday afternoon. That, and her labcoat smells heavenly. Absolutely heavenly, I can not get enough of that scent lol. Mm… She has to be an angel.
Another thing I’ve realised is that there are always two sides (or more) to every story, and a fool follows only one. I’ve acknowledged this in the past, and yet I still have such narrow views, as Pete will be glad to support. I want to broaden my views and remember all my philosophies for more than a few minutes, but I’m having trouble breaking the norm. I’m an individual, that much is certain, but sometimes I forget why.
I have here four quotes.
“Remember the good times; don’t mourn for them.”
“See the candle in the darkness, the stars in the night, the sun behind the rainclouds…”
“Remember this night whenever you are lonely. Whenever you want to cry, or whenever you feel sad, just remember tonight Ivy. Remember my touch, my warmth, my love…”
Unfortunately, at the same time I knew that remembering what isn’t there offers little condolence, but that ties back to my first quote. Enjoy them, remember how happy you became and let that memory of happiness bring a smile to your face, just as it brings one to mine.
“Happiness is a choice.” You can choose to feel happy when someone gives you a compliment, or you could choose not to. Pessimism and optimism, but ultimately, it’s up to you whether or not you want to be happy.
Sound familiar? ‘course they do. And I also have a huge string of questions and philosophies which I’ll publish in another entry to save you from reading more than you can be bothered.
I love Ivy~