Having spent two weeks off work, I’ve spent about half my waking hours thinking about work. I can categorise these thoughts into three broad types:
- I wonder whether anyone will want me/I’m so broken I’ll fail at anything I try. Maybe I shouldn’t leave my current job and just put up with it – it’s not great, but it’s mostly safe and familiar.
- I don’t want to risk rejection and hard work. I’ll just get an easy job in retail or a library.
- I’m really fucking good at counselling. Sure wish there was a convenient way for others to see it too, and then hire me in conditions that suit me.
These three categories also happen to be listed in order of how frequently I think them. I’d say the ratio is about 75:20:5.