My favourite internet search terms

I recently realised that my blog has the capacity to see not only which pages people are visiting, but internet search terms they use to find their way here. I normally don’t pay that kind of information any attention, but I noticed a phrase one day that caught my attention and made me laugh. I went through the archives of search terms, and I thought I’d put together this list of my favourites! It will be interesting tosee what kind of search terms people use in the future.

• “australopithecus anamensis” (with over 150 hits leading poor researchers to my blog)
• “psychotic+reaction+to+attending+kairos+retreat”
• “how to knock yourself out” or “how to knock yourself out safely”, and “can you knock yourself out while lying down”
• “this is my sex story wordpress singapore”
• “Kamatz, matsi and lakota”, which fills me with joy. I had forgotten about them.
• “girls camp cold night ‘sleeping in shorts'”
• “poems xin raindrop” (Naww, thanks whoever liked my poem enough to search for it twice!)
• “concussion.write.about.ajahn brahm”
• Quite a few hits for “dark brotherhood” and other Skyrim and Oblivion adventures
• “women hunting in coondle”
• “i don’t want to be a social worker anymore” (Friend, I wish you all the best.)
• “poetic ways to die”
• “manchoon meaning” (My friend’s name is Manchoon! XD)
• “snow fight groin guard”
• “keys to limitless sex”
• “letting go ego and striving” (Glad to see someone’s getting something out of my posts.)
• “poem if i die will any notice”
• “placement at centrelink” and “social work at RPH” and “social work placements perth”
• “livechinesex”
• “Malaysia one liners” (and surprisingly many variations of this)
• “unemployment is killing me”
• “yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahoo”
• “how to look like lord voldemort in skyrim”
• “oei uho u jkifat,” (which means “you are a stupid” in Dino, the fictional language from Starfox Adventures. Yes, I was so cool when I was fourteen that I learned the whole language fluently enough to have conversations with myself.)
• “skyrim astrid hot”
• “depressive humour” Aww… :(
• “how to survive a cold shower” and “martial arts cold shower”
• “english bobby policeman paper mache made in scotland”
• “nietzsche overman”
• “penang sex story” and “penang real gay stories” and “penang hotel seks gay kiss” (Okay, now it’s starting to get a little creepy.)
• “i own his ass pt3”
• “real experience having sex in penang” (As far as I can tell, these are all independent searches. Or one very determined individual who believes if he or she changes search terms, they’ll uncover something in my blog.)
• “how to survive a gashuku”
• “perth sexpo” and “perth sexpo afterparty 2013”
• And my personal favourite, “scottish bobby hats weight”

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