Doo be doo doo…

Possibly the main reason I haven’t been blogwhoring is because everyone has their own little problems. No one’s going to have a perfect life, I know, but when people have a problem and I start whinging about my own, it’s just insensitive to them. Thus, I ask your pardon for this entry. Other people write in their blogs about shit days- I read those all the time. I guess it’s a way of letting it out, and as much as I regret the idea of being a whiny little bitch, I’m going to do it anyway, just for shits and giggles. Why am I swearing so much? Swearing is language used badly if anything, and I’m just overdoing it. But they’re the words that come to mind, and I’m too tired to think of synonyms.

I’m really tired right now. Got around 6 hours sleep. Why was I awake so long? Well I can tell you that I’d have gotten closer to eight if I didn’t stay up past midnight signing up on twenty, count ’em, twenty various RuneScape clan forums and asking them questions about how their clan is going. In exchange, Eugene agreed never to set my hair on fire again. Was it worth it? Fuck all. That doesn’t even make sense, but it feels like the appropriate phrase to use. So hell, I’m tired now, and I’ve been getting less and less sleep since.. Jeez it’s only been three days since the weekend.

I just don’t have time. I’m so entirely obsessed with how little time I have. Since either last week or the weekend, I have been working pretty much flat out to fulfill all my work requirements and still appease my friends who I’ve been ignoring for so long. Well I’m sorry friends, I don’t have that much time to talk to you. This is going to be an awful thing to say, but if we talk for longer than five minutes, I’ll probably end up regretting it. I organise my time so thoroughly five minutes is all I’d have to talk, right before doing something else. And I realised judging from how long my phone calls usually are (about 15-90 minutes) it’d be pretty rude to call, say hello, make small talk, then hang up. So I’m busy right now, and I’m not getting enough sleep, and it’s driving me crazy. Eh, cliché, but whatcha gonna do.

Going to Malaysia this Saturday. I’m sorry if you didn’t know that, but f… I’ve been so freakin’ busy! By the way, I stole time to write this while my coffee kicked in. By the gods I’ve started drinking coffee every morning, and sometimes in the afternoons too!!! This is unheard of, this is not me, but hell, I need the freaking caffeine. Is irritability a symptom of insomnia? Yeah pretty sure it is. Anyway, Malaysia this Saturday. Before the weekend, here’s what I want to do.
-Reply to Willow’s letters
-Do six or seven assignments on the Malaysia rainforests. (not compulsory, but otherwise I’ll have no appreciation of where I’m going)
-Human bio busywork (still my best and favourite subject)
-Intensive research/study/quotes memorisation on No Sugar for English Literature. Look! It’s underlined! Do I get a pat on the head now?
-Piano, an hour every night.
-Taekwondo for approximately 105 minutes on Wednesday and Thursday.
-Melbourne chorale visit on Friday. Surprisingly it ends closer to 1500hrs rather than the 1800hrs I’d anticipated. This gives me (possibly) enough time to see
-Transformers, more than meets the eye. I may not have time, though I desperately, desperately want to see it in the movies.
-Pack! I’m not sure how long it takes to pack a suitcase, but according to Mr Blake, I’m well and truly fucked by now. I don’t plan to pack tonight, I probably won’t have time to pack tomorrow, and Friday may or may not be for packing. Saturday morning 1000hrs, I’m off. Bleargh! Maybe I’ll go with an empty suitcase and just buy a whole wardrobe while I’m there.

Yo, I’m really (that’s slang for you know by the way) starting to regret this whole Malaysia thing. I could use a holiday- I tell you, the things I want to do, books I want to read, subjects I want to study let alone the games I want to play are just overwhelming. When I get back, I’ll have about five or six days, most of which I’ll probably spend away from civilisation. I won’t have time (I predict) to read Harry Potter, so don’t you dare tell me ANYTHING about the book. It’ll be unavoidable, so I guess I’ll have to read it in those five or six days and ignore/neglect everything else I need to do. Including seeing the movies of both. Far out I’ve been working too hard, I don’t have time to stop! Wooo okay, I’ve got about 12 minutes to go from "Just drank coffee" to "Ready to go".

And another thing. Taekwondo, not sure when the last time I talked about it was. I’m 5th Gup right now, which is halfway to blackbelt.
1st Grading: Double promotion.
2nd Grading: Double promotion.
3rd Grading: Honour’s pass.
Didn’t really think I could get another double promo, but when I saw the score sheet, I was well and truly up there. I was absolute pwnage. Yet, there was one thing they didn’t warn me about; the power test. I had to break a board, and apparently I’m all technique and no strength (as Jack put it). I came closest to breaking the board, but it was not actually broken. Maybe I’m convincing myself of fallacies here, but perhaps I was holding myself back for fear of overdoing it? Oh well, whatever, board not broken. If I’d passed the power test, Mistress Carmela (mistress is not the word. Master doesn’t seem to fit) said I would have double promoted. Oh well, I’m happy being 5th Gup, but I just thought I’d let you know.

In other TKD news which you probably don’t care about, I just got my club jacket. Woot, it’s sweet. Maybe I can use it to intimidate those pricks of Year 11’s (Joe, Nick, Tom etc. That’s almost Tom Dick and Harry, as the saying goes. At least I think it’s how it goes. I don’t really care) into not fighting me. Whatever, no real time to talk about them.

Started wearing a headband to class. It’s the $10 (psh. I regret it? Nah, too late for regrets) official club headband that the "Little Tigers" wear. Little Tigers are like 4-6 years old by the way. They look cute running around with their headbands and screaming "KIYAAAAAAAAAAAH!" for ten second intervals. Anyway, I bought one cause I thought it looked awes. Apparently not. The general consensus is I look like a kid, and a gay one at that. Maybe I’ll upload a picture later on and ask your opinion, but right now, time-less.

Also, haven’t seen Dak. Kinda glad, he was showing me down. However, two new arrivals who are pretty much my level in terms of skill. I’ve never seen anyone so close to my power level, if you will. I hope they return- I very much look forward to training with them.

Um, what else. Oh yeah, by the by, I had my most awesome sesh on Saturday. For Taekwondo I mean. My sentences are rambles, but eh. Anyway, I wore my headband for the first time and I was seriously ownage. I was intensely focused and disciplined, rigid form, full speed, power and a surprising level of height for the entire hour. I didn’t slack off once. That’s a first, something I’ve always dreamed of doing and I finally did. I attributed it to the positive Qi my headband was releasing. 0wn4g3 factor 10. However, last night was less of a success, maybe because I’d had some negative feedback about my beloved. At any rate, seems I have good and bad days, and no level of headband can change that.

Two minutes to get ready. Perhaps I’ll scoot off now? Yeah sure. Not like I was going to be on time anyway. At least I’m not tired anymore.

Well, toodles! Hope I have enough time to live soon. And all of you, please take care of yourselves! To be honest, one of the main reasons I ask is because I don’t have time to spare for you, as awful as that is. Basically, bleh. And that’s all I have to say about that.

With love and sorrow, and some level of hubris,


PS: Who do you think you are?


3 thoughts on “Doo be doo doo…

  1. Bethwyn says:

    I’ll miss you when you go away. Don’t stress too much, ok? If you can. I’m sure your headband looks great =]

  2. Liam, Baron of Hoskuldstadir says:

    My god that was one caffiene charged yellow toothed word on word on a string of blood tour de force.
    You’re not fucked for packing for Saturday. Spend fifteen minutes getting clothes together and make sure they’re washed and don’t wear them in the meantime. Check all the items on the list, then write a list for your parents and get them to buy items you don’t have while you’re at school on Thursday(if they can). If you get that done by tomorrow night, then at least you can ask Blake about the remaining items on the list (and how and where to get them), which means you can get your parents to get them during Friday (again, if they can). Hopefully if that works, by Friday night you’ll be able to take inventory and have a packed bag ready for Saturday which allows you to do a double check and relax. I’ve just realised that you’ll probably never get this message in time for my convoluted plan to work so try to forget this whole paragraph if you can.
    There is time. My god there’s time. Sometimes its easy to think that time’s going to fast to actually use it, but remember that everything you do with the time, you are using it. Brush up for ten minutes on the causes of inflation, you’ve actually made an effort to study for economics. No one can judge you for having trouble dealing with five TEE subjects, taekwondo, piano practice and a social life at the same time- the fact that you’re getting it all in is a credit to you: a lot of people have given up and have started compulsive Myspace-quizzing again.
    You will enjoy Malaysia. Bring a camera if you can, even a crappy dispasable. You’re not going to fall behind at school, Transformers is going to be in the movies for aAAAAAAAAges and no matter how much study and piano and taekwondo and whatever you try to fit in, you’re still going to have time to do things you want: read books, play games, watch movies. Quite frankly, any amount of study during the holidays means that you’ve put in an effort far beyond that which is expected of you. You have a sense of panic and urgency which is making you run too fast and breathe too quickly.
    And you are not a ‘whiny little bitch’- if society had people the way it wanted, we’d be cartwheeling everywhere to the sound of harps and the sky would be full of rainbows and every time you turned the tv on there would be more rainbows and it would just be bullshit. There is a whole spectrum of human emotions that we experience every day: happiness is not a default setting, with sadness something weird or laughable.  Plus it helps to have a blog to shout stuff from: this site is called ‘Xin’s Domain’: it is for you, by you, and all about you, and judging by the wideness of its readership, people are actually interested. Have more trust in the people around you: they (the smart ones) can accept change, including the fact that you might be pursuing a more individual way of life (if you’re anything like me). If you’re not, and in a few days or weeks or months you suddenly decide that you were wrong, people aren’t going to see you and say ‘oh look who’s crawling back after having judged us all’. There are always people around you, regardless of how clearly they can see your insides.

  3. Ivy says:

    Hello! This is your ex-girlfriend checking up on my emo John. Let me give you about a tip: people will usually forgive you for ranting in your blog about wasting time IF you DON’T spend an entire first paragraph apologising for it. Like Liam said, this is your domain afterall. and most of us have been reading this long enough to know what you write about anyway. We’re masochistist people who enjoy reading your blog just to say "Hey, I’VE GOT IT WORST THAN YOU!"
    Well, at least I have! ((:
    You have more time than me. School starts at 7.30 for me, before the sun even risen I have to wake up at 5.30am. Night before, I’d feel guilty if I slept before 11. Just how much sleep do I get, knowing that I still wake up at 3am to do work?
    Granted, I don’t have as many activities as you, but I need a lot more beauty sleep than you, by right. You know me. ((x
    Sweetie you do have time on your hands. Sometimes we RG girls sacrifice alot of our social life, limited only to classtime (which is actually a lot, in a sad way). Watching a movie? You have to calculate how many assignment time is that you’re wasting up.
    I think you can do better. Don’t stress out ABOUT taking a break! Then it will not be a break at all. And goodness, you KNOW you need it. ((:
    Last year in school for you. who cares if you have a hell of a time in the middle? Hardly anyone does. It’s the end that’s hallelujah. This is just the stress period- grit your teeth and get through it: once it’s over, you can play all you want. It’s not that far now. ((:
    Talk to you soon honey, enjoy malaysia. There’s a huge trial about a murdered Mongolian woman there, and lots of crime spates recently. Take care!*
    *P.S.: I was gonna say "don’t get raped!" but decided it would be offensive both to you and the citizens so I add it as a postscript instead. Makes so much sense! It’s purely comical. Tralala~

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