HAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Zomg that’s like the best quote I’ve heard all week. This will mean nothing to you, but I just find it absolutely hilarious.

So here’s the story. Note: I am talking about the video game, Prince of Persia: Warrior Within.

The Dahaka, guardian of the timeline, is bound to kill whoever opens the sands of time. The whole point of the game is for the Prince to go back in time to destroy the Empress of Time before she can create the sands. Basically, the Dahaka is a beast- classic. It looks like a minotaur, except entirely black, red eyes, and tendrils of dark energy coming out of him. He uses these to snag prey. So the Prince of Persia goes back in time and faces endless trials that test his very existence to the limits, and every now and then, the Dahaka catches up with him. The Dahaka can’t travel through water, and it can basically smash through walls. So, after one of these many dozens of chases for life, the Prince gets pissed off and says "Catch me if you can!"
Keep in mind this thing is indestructable, can leap faster than you can run, does not rest or eat or need anything. It is driven solely by the need to kill aforementioned Prince of Persia.

The Prince dashes out onto a stone bridge, the Dahaka following. As the stone crumbles (the Dahaka weighs like, a tonne, and this bridge is old and cracked), the Prince makes a leap for the ledge as the rock gives out from under him. The Dahaka falls into the darkness in slow motion (Lord of the Rings style- when the Balrog was stopped by Gandalf), and as one last resort, it sends out a tendril of dark energy to drag the Prince down with him. The Prince just screams in fury as he draws his sword and slices the tendril off in an explosion of blood and sand.
"Die, you bastard!" he cries.

The venom in his voice was perfect. Pretend you’re gritting your teeth. The rhythm is almost hypnotic. Die you bastard! Ha ha! Good old Prince. I cried with mirth. Legendary game.

PS: In other news, ZELDA OCARINA OF TIME IS BROKEN! [insert swearing here]
I will find a way to repair the disk somehow, but… Damnation! Ah well, Prince of Persia summoning. Have I found a new favourite game? Zelda will always be a classic though. Rambles!

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