Ji Kun Do

What I’d give to have a katana, right now. I discovered that I’ve been holding them upside down. No, that doesn’t mean blade first. That means that the curve arcs in a hat shape, not a cup shape. At any rate, I’d love to have one right now, so I could stand in my weed-riddled back yard and raise it by my side.
With deliberately painful slowness, I would teach myself techniques and moves, and then, forms. It’s not Tai-Chi Willow, though I do admit, I do stretch like that. It’s just my way of being somewhat artistic about it, if you will. It makes me feel in control. I can feel my heart beat, I can sense my blood flowing, I can almost tap into an inner strength. It makes me feel powerful, completely in control, and with unnerring precision.
Remember when Willow was trying to get me out of her room? Despite her bulk, I could have overcome her with ease. Of course, I could never hurt a lady, but that didn’t stop me from shirking off her arms or finding a way to delicately push her off. Come to think of it, I’d absolutely love to fight you in a wide open space, and if I could overcome my chivalry. Something tells me I’d be a clutz and fall over everything behind me. For some reason, I don’t think I’d be able to go full out, because I don’t think I can bring myself to kick someone in the face or snap their neck etc. I could do it, easily, even someone of your considerable height. Nah, I wouldn’t be able to go full out.
You know what? I need to hire a team of ninja assassins to sneak up on me when I least expect it, not including when I’m using the toilet or shower. Yes. That would be my challenge.
NOTE: It is my goal to lift a car. I will get there. Mark my words.

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